I felt so helpless this past Saturday after seeing something that made me feel horrible for the rest of the weekend.聽 I still do.
My brother and I had tickets to the Saskatchewan Rush game up in Saskatoon, so we set out for the city that afternoon.聽 Upon leaving the Conquest village limits, Brendon said, 鈥淟et鈥檚 take Highway 45 so we can get out there by the Dalmeny Road.鈥�
What he meant was that if you take the Dalmeny Road near the Walmart in the city鈥檚 Blairmore subdivision, it鈥檚 basically a straight shot out to the SaskTel Centre and you avoid all the traffic of downtown Saskatoon.
I took his advice and turned left, eventually making my way up to Highway 45.
I would soon wish that I鈥檇 listened to myself and gone up to Saskatoon by way of Highway 219 outside of Outlook.聽 At least that way, I could鈥檝e avoided what I would soon see, and I would鈥檝e been content with living in ignorant bliss.
We were on the highway heading up to Delisle for a few minutes before we were soon coming across a dead deer, located just above a ditch in a field not far from the St. Ambrose Cemetery Road.聽 Okay, I instinctively thought to myself, this isn鈥檛 a big deal.聽 We live in rural Saskatchewan, and while you hate to see any animal killed in an unnatural way, we鈥檝e all come to accept the fact that vehicles and wildlife are going to meet in some very unfortunate circumstances sometimes.
And then the deer lifted its head up and looked at my SUV as I drove past.
Yep, you read that right.聽 This poor deer, who I can only assume was hit by a vehicle and left to its own crippled devices, was laid out on its stomach just above a ditch in a barren Saskatchewan field with nary a soul around.聽 There was a growing hole in the side of its body, crows already pecking at the wound.
I don鈥檛 mind telling you in this column space that I nearly burst into tears at the sight of it.聽 It鈥檚 an image that I hope will fade away from my memory in time.聽 I can still see the deer lifting its head up to watch me drive by, possibly holding on to the hope that I鈥檇 pull over, get out and help it in some way, or at least do something 鈥� ANYTHING 鈥� to end its completely unnecessary suffering.
I felt utterly helpless in the situation.聽 This animal was suffering to a high degree and it didn鈥檛 deserve to leave this planet in that fashion.聽 I pulled over and called home, asking my mother to grab a phonebook or even Google if there鈥檚 a number that one can call in the event of wildlife being in distress, or think of some local hunter that we know who could at least go out there and end the poor thing鈥檚 agony and misery.
I drove on, disturbed by what I saw.聽 I had to move on with the rest of my day and the rest of my life, and I hated myself in that instance for doing it.
I鈥檓 an animal lover.聽 I always have been, I always will be.聽 I was raised in a household that routinely had dogs and cats.聽 Well, one cat who reached the impressive age of 17 years.聽 We even had a turtle.聽 Outside the immediate Ruttle homestead, my father raised us kids around horses out at the farmyard where we kept them just outside of town.聽 We used to have pigs out there, too.
Suffice to say, there were plenty of living creatures in my life growing up that had four legs and tails.聽 I watched some of them suffer, and it鈥檚 a feeling that pulls you down low because you鈥檒l give anything to take away an animal鈥檚 pain.聽 Sometimes you have the resources to end that pain.聽 Those other times, you don鈥檛.
Don鈥檛 mistake me as having a weak constitution.聽 I鈥檝e seen plenty of dead deer in my life.聽 With as much driving as I do, I鈥檝e seen it all.聽 I also have numerous family members and friends who hunt, and I have no issues with the sport because in that instance, you鈥檙e respecting the animal by ending its life as quick as one good shot, and the remains are typically used to feed one鈥檚 family and provide nourishment.
I just happened to have one experience with a deer whose life was coming to a very painful and horrifically slow end.聽 I quickly had to accept the fact that this poor thing was simply going to bleed out, or freeze, or those crows were going to do their damage to the point where it went into shock and its heart would just seize up.
I鈥檓 very truly sorry that I couldn鈥檛 do anything to end your suffering, my wild friend.
By the way, I Googled if there is in fact a number that one can call in the event that wildlife is in distress, but only after I鈥檇 done a thorough search and waded my way through multiple pages.聽 In other words, the information is there if you know exactly where to look, but there鈥檚 also no guarantee that someone will come along in time to do something to end the suffering of a living creature.
Unfortunately, the Circle of Life can sometimes be very cruel and unforgiving.
For this week, that鈥檚 been the Ruttle Report.
