Amidst the many feet of garland, multiple Nativity scenes and dozens of light-up village pieces that get put up at our house at Christmas are several decorations that I can't wait to take out of storage and hold in my hands once again. An ornament that hung on our tree each year since I was a little girl, a snow globe that plays music, and some homemade items that a very good friend made for us.
Laurie was such an artistic, creative individual. She did beautiful sketches and paintings and could make just about any craft you can imagine. The ones she made for Christmas are delightful; a winter landscape done in crackle paint, an adorable piece with detachable scarf, mitts and toque for a snowman entitled “Some Assembly Required” and beautiful hand painted manger scenes for each of our girls. These pieces bring with them a rush of emotion and a flood of memories when I take them out of the box and put them out for the season.
There were many gifts exchanged over the years including ones she didn’t make, but there is one among them that was very special to us. Not long after the adoptions of our daughters from Romania, Laurie brought us four beautiful dessert dishes handcrafted in Romania. She was so excited to give them and I remember her so clearly letting us know she wanted us to use them and not tuck them away in some cupboard. She told us she would be so disappointed if we determined they were too special to use.
But they were just so pretty. Still are. They have sat unused for years now. I tried, oh, how I tried. But I was so afraid one would get chipped or broken. So, I put them up in a cupboard…tucked away…out of reach. It is a regret.
In my attempt to keep them valuable, I made them unavailable. All those moments I could have enjoyed fruit or ice cream or any number of sweet treats with my girls when they were growing up. Auntie Laurie would have loved that. We missed out on it all. All the conversation and laughter that would now be connected to those dishes. I would have loved that, but I didn’t make it happen.
We lost Laurie to kidney disease in May 2020. The Christmas decorations she made are beautiful and we treasure them for the weeks they adorn our walls. I wouldn't dream of not hanging them up each year. The dessert bowls are beautiful as well, but I didn’t bring them out. I did not honor Laurie’s wishes to use and enjoy them. Even on the day we said goodbye to her I still didn’t go and retrieve them from the cupboard. It would have been a perfect opportunity, but I let it slip through my fingers. She would have laughed as she scolded me– oh, she had a great laugh – and told me to pull them out of the back of the cupboard once and for all.
Another friend of mine has made me promise we will do that before Christmas. And we will.
Yes, we might accidentally crack or chip one, but wouldn’t that be better than letting them languish at the back of a shelf unused, unseen and unappreciated? I know Laurie thought so, and likely so would all those who have given us those precious gifts that are too special not to put into the hands of those who could appreciate and enjoy them.
So one evening soon we will gather with friends, and those dessert bowls will come out of the cupboard. They will likely be filled with something rather ordinary, but sharing the moment together will be extraordinary for us. They were meant to be used so we’ll use them. Yes, we might break one, but better to break a dish than break the heart of those that gifted us with something so precious. That's my outlook.
