Check out the front page story of our newspaper last week and it might just force you to sit back and think.
I know it did for me after I attended the meeting focused around it.
The community of Outlook has seemed to shine a spotlight on the issue that is bullying and has come up with an official anti-bullying bylaw that will work to protect people of all ages from any form of physical or verbal harassment or discrimination. This bylaw includes penalties of up to $1000 or serving up to 50 hours of community service, but the truth is that while those penalties are there and will be enforced if necessary, police don't really want to have to carry them out.
You see, that would mean that any such bullying that is going on has reached the point where the victim(s) feel that getting law enforcement involved is the only plausible way out of the situation. See what I mean? No, I get where constables Jesse Kimball and Fraser Cameron were coming from during their presentation at Outlook High School. Where the police would come in and where any such fines or penalties would come in would be in the 'last resort' stage of any such situation. No one wants to see things escalate to that point, but on the other hand, it's great to see that such measures are now in place to tell anyone who may be suffering that, hey, people are there for you. There IS a solution for you, if things escalate to such a nature.
The world is a very different place now compared to when you and I were probably growing up. Now, it's easy to chalk things up to saying that people have become 'soft' or just incredibly thin-skinned, but the reality is that there are so many different avenues these days that can make people prone to criticism, harassment and bullying, particularly with all the 750,000 different forms of high-tech communication and social media apps that are littering the online world. When I was going to school, we had dial-up internet and MSN Messenger, where you could talk to people instantly if, well, they happened to be online at the same time as you. Today, you've got Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Instagram, Tik Tok, Vine, and a laundry list of other popular trends that are used by millions of people around the globe.
In a lot of ways, it could be argued that those of us who grew up in the other previous generations had it easier than those who are growing up and trying to make sense of this world today. I mean, I can only speak for myself, but I genuinely don't know how teenage me would've fared in this digital world that the younger generations are growing up in. I guess I'm just glad that I graduated and got outta dodge before the likes of Facebook became popular.
That's not to say that bullying is a "new and trendy" thing. Not by a very, very, very long shot. I remember dreading having to go to school when I was much younger because of some daily cracks being made about my weight. As a big kid, you stand out, and therefore more attention comes your way because you happen to look different than most people. I had my share of jokes made about me and snickers behind my back, and all a kid could really do back then was cry about it behind closed doors, go to sleep at night, wake up, rinse and repeat if necessary. See, the thing was that everybody knew you could always go to your parents or to the teachers if things were going on that just weren't right, but it's as if there was something of a "code" between kids about snitching. No one wanted to be tattled on, but there were also kids who didn't want to do the tattling because that would mean getting adults involved and the whole thing would just draw way too much attention. No, the thing that most of us did was just smile in public and wipe tears away back behind those closed doors.
It wasn't right then, and it isn't right now.
There are times when bullying does in fact go too far to the point where there is no return. I can remember a birthday party I attended that was held in the former Conquest school in October of 2016. I met a young woman there who talked to me about her time spent growing up at a local school that I will not name here. She said that while she'd made a few friends, some of her views clashed with those of others at this place, and therefore she was shunned and looked down upon in some circles by both students and staff. It led her to some pretty dark places in her mind, and she was struggling on an almost-daily basis to maintain a positive spirit. I sympathized with her, and while there are always two sides to every story, I couldn't help but be shocked to hear of her alienation at a place that I had always thought to be accepting and understanding of people and their beliefs.
We talked for what seemed like a few hours. Despite her troubles that had apparently held a hard grip on her since high school, she seemed like a genuinely nice, sweet person and I felt one of those instant, easy-going, 'I totally get this person' vibes from them. We exchanged numbers to text, we became friends on Facebook, and I hoped for the best for her.
Unfortunately, this is one of those situations that can remind you that some things in life just aren't fair and that the proverbial fairy tale ending doesn't always happen. That young lady, with her whole life still ahead of her, came to the nightmarish conclusion that there was no exit from her troubles and no one she could turn to for help. She took a loaded gun, went out to a churchyard out in the countryside, and took her own life in the spring of 2018. When I heard the news, I was absolutely floored. A young woman's life was still very much ahead of her, but she felt that in those last few troubling moments of her life, there was no light at the end of the tunnel and there was no one wanting to save her.
I still think about her sometimes. Man, I'd give anything to just meet her for a coffee and ask her if she was okay. Sometimes, that's just what a person is looking for - an outlet.
Sadly, it's too late for her, but perhaps now there's some light at the end of that dark tunnel for people who feel they can't turn anywhere else.
Victims, tell us how we can help. Everyone else, listen and listen hard.
For this week, that's been the Ruttle Report.
