I was a student fresh out of university when I auditioned for a music team that travelled across the country. It was an amazing adventure that not only introduced me to the man who would become my husband, but provided glimpses into many interesting walks of life.
We had conversations with people from coast to coast. Farmers and fishermen, miners and mechanics, dog groomers and doctors, pilots and politicians, hairstylists and home business owners, refugees and roofers, teachers and tax specialists. There were some that really stood out to me: a man who was a speech writer for the federal government, a woman who headed a news bureau, a family who turned a home business into tremendous financial success; people who represented the kind of achievements many would be dreaming of fresh out of school.
So why is it then, that while I remember what those people did, I don’t have a clear memory of who they were. However, there was a woman in Thunder Bay I recall very well to this day.
At one point in her life she had thought about a career in health care, however her husband’s frequent job transfers and the arrival of four children put her focus on their home. Once her kids got older she decided to enter the job market and quickly found a position she absolutely loved--at a fast food franchise. She told us that while it was true women of her age didn’t necessarily seek out this type of job or perceive it as a sign of success, she loved it. Not because of the work, which she described as draining, but because of the people she worked alongside. She took a sincere interest in her co-workers who were predominantly teenagers and young adults. She got to know them, knew what was going on in their lives and became an important figure to many of them. Just how important those relationships were got reflected in invitations to high school events, family birthdays, and even a baptism. She laughed and told us she never would have anticipated attending so many graduation ceremonies in her life but that there was no pay cheque she could collect that would ever be worth as much as being part of these young people’s milestones.
A young man working for a Silicon Valley company shared his story with a group of recent college graduates. He had been making $1.5 million a year in salary which was outpaced by bonuses and lucrative stock options. He owned a million-dollar house, property in another country, and several luxury cars he bought with cash. But he told the young adults not to admire him for that, but instead to think about what he did next.
Feeling anxious and dissatisfied, he walked away from a life that was making him terribly unhappy. His love of cars took a hit when he began calculating how many days he was working to cover maintenance and care of vehicles he never drove. His overseas property which was meant to be the gift of a vacation spot for extended family became a source of heartbreak when he received complaints about location, size and access to amenities. He began cutting people out of his life who resented him, took advantage of him, or were phony around him. His biggest regret is that his belief that people are inherently good was shattered, and no amount of money is going to be able to heal those wounds. He encouraged the college grads to deeply enjoy whatever it was they were experiencing right now because that was the ultimate wealth.
There may not have been financial incentives that kept the woman in Thunder Bay on the job, but the intangibles of connection, building relationship and impacting others was reward enough, while people around the Silicon Valley whiz kid just wanted him to pick up the tab.
We often look to the ultra-rich and philanthropists as having the tools capable of making the biggest impact on the world around us. While there is much they can do, it’s not just about the money. The woman I met working fast food is unlikely to ever have those kinds of resources. But she wielded a powerful tool. We all do. Our time, our attention and our willingness to show up when it counts has the potential to create more change than any of our dollars will. That’s my outlook.
