When our girls were little we would set aside a day every few months to go through “the box.” It was a large, heavy duty container used to store the clothes, shoes and boots we had been given by families whose children had outgrown them. It didn’t take long for them to learn that if something was too big it would go back in the box to try another time, while if the item was too small it would be put in a pile to be passed along to another family.
Our youngest daughter quickly developed a trick for dealing with shoes depending on whether she liked them or not. Even as a young child the girl knew what she wanted.
When she was about five, we pulled out a pair of pink sandals that she thought were very pretty but we could see were clearly too small. Undeterred, she crammed her feet into them to prove they would work. “Perfect,” she said with a grin, unwilling to show us the way her toes were curled up under the strap.
Knowing we had to put those in the giveaway box I attempted to distract her with a pair of brown shoes instead. It was obvious she didn’t like them nearly as much as the pink ones. She slipped them on and even though they were way too big, she looked at me, squiggled up her nose and said, “Oh no. They’re pinchy.” Her feet were swimming in them but she didn’t like them and wanted them moved to the giveaway box.
There are areas of my life that pinch that I need to get better at dealing with. There are other times I get myself in situations that simply don’t fit me well. Maybe it’s things I don’t want to deal with or circumstances where I overestimate my need to be involved. But trying to make a situation fit, or deciding to ignore what is obvious because it’s more comfortable, just creates problems.
I can point to times in my life when I went with the pretty pink option and tried to force a situation simply because it looked more attractive. It was not the right choice for me but I crammed down what I should have done because I thought others would like it better. Then there are the times I was presented with the sturdy brown option. It was the better choice but it wasn’t flashy or attention grabbing, and honestly required more patience to move ahead with. It was ultimately the better choice but really, why should I have to wait, or work hard at it when others get the prettier, more charming options?
In the coming months we will be finding our way back into more of what our lives looked like previous to March 2020. Some activities will resume, others may not, either based on recommendations by others…or what we decide on our own. Many of us are facing a watershed moment. We are being given the chance to consider where our time, energy and resources will be going. We’ve had the opportunity to reflect on the things we were or weren’t doing prior to the shutdown and now is the moment to seriously consider what deserves our efforts as we move forward.
Are we putting on shoes of involvement because they genuinely fit or are we trying to make things work that don’t suit us nearly as well? They’re pinchy, too cumbersome or simply not right for us. Yes, we can grow into roles and work at making them a better fit, but first let’s be sure true desire, interest and passion is there from the start.
We need to dig deep into the box of possibilities in our life to find what works. If we’re going to resume all the running again, we should take a moment and ensure it is taking us in the direction we want to go. In our eagerness to get going we need to be sure we put on the right running shoes. What fits best is what’s best for us. That’s my outlook.
